Delousing

As I have said, I live near the Opera Comique. To the right of it, so do bums. Before this story, there were four. Current count is two. Here is why:

The Opera Comique runs, well, comedic operas. Apparently having four bums living on its grounds is not so funny. That, and for the previous month, the bums made the rue Marivaux their latrine. Potty humor is out this year.

Why the bums did not defecate on a different street, maybe one they did not sleep near, leaves much to wonder. Then again, it does vindicate the phrase “lazy bum”.

Something had to be done.

The police were called because bums do not like being told what to do. The bums had convenient grates on the side of the Opera Comique that could house bum sleeping gear. These grates housed this equipment so well that it begs the question, “Why build bum grates if you do not want to attract bums?”.

The sounds of vitamin baton were not heard, but the bums’ protests were vehement. This is France, after all, and if there is something to protest, we come to party.

Next up were the street cleaners. These brave souls had the dubious job of removing from the street what rightfully belongs in the sewer. Lucky for them, every so often along a Paris street there is a magic knob. This magic knob allows street cleaners to flush the curbs, and anything in them, into the sewer.

True magic was performed this day.

Finally, the men in white. These men were in charge of cleaning, and possibly disposing of, the bum sleep gear. They moved in with their hand pumps and meant business.

Tasks completed, work beckoned.

The evening greeted each passerby bum free. The street smelled less of a latrine (one of the bad Paris smells) and more like anything but a latrine (the good Paris smell).